I’ll be driving from North Carolina back to Michigan when you read this post, so I thought it would be a good time to talk about the state of Ohio.
If you don’t know anything about Ohio, know this: the state goes on forever.
There were times when I was like, “This must be West Virginia. There’s a tanning salon in a house.”
Nope, it was Ohio.
Dudes, it’s the longest, most boringest state in the union — next to Iowa.
Meg Bear over at Talented Apps inspired me to put Ohio on notice: get interesting or get the hell out of America.


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ouch!
EXCEPT FOR THE CLEVE!
Wow L, that one was below the belt.
Ohio has many, many wonderful and beautiful attributes. Just check out this list of 101 things to do in Ohio and you’ll be surprised by all the grandeur that is this “heart of it all” swing state:
http://consumer.discoverohio.com/graphics/articles/articlesImages/101%20things%20to%20do.pdf
Alright, now I’ve got to step up and pimp for my home state, here is a brief list of the mega interesting just from my corner of the state (still consider myself an Ohioan trapped in Minnesota):
Worlds Largest Comedy Club – Hilarities in Cleveland
Rock and Roll Hall of Fame
West Side Market in Cleveland (voted on of the top 10 public spaces in the country)
Jack Hanna (would he qualify as a punk rock zoo keeper)
Cedar Point – Rollercoaster capital of America
Birthplace of Drew Carey – my HR role model
I could go on and on, Ohio is so not diss worthy, now Minnesota…
@Bryan It’s okay to pick on West Virginia but not Ohio? Akshully, Ohio is lovely and has wonderful attributes — just like any other state in America. The interstate highway system is so freakin boring, though. Also, it wouldn’t be RAWR ANGRY PUNK ROCK if I wrote a diatribe against the highway. I had to vilify the whole state.
@Jimmy Jack Hanna is awesome back in the day. On Larry King? Not so much. I always want to ask, “Is there someone under 80 who can supervise these old dudes?”
Hey Laurie -
As one who has made the drive between Washington, DC and Michigan more times than I care to admit, I suspect you’re referring to the endless 200+ mile stretch of bland road that is the I-80/Ohio Turnpike. My wife and I absolutely hate that portion of the trip.
A little trivia for you – On what road did my U-Haul burst into flames when I moved from Chicago to DC? That’s right, I-80 in Ohio. No love lost here….
It’s long, straight, boring and you only have rest stops (very nice ones though) to look forward to. Only iPods and/or satellite radio can save your sanity. However, I suspect that even though I-80 is hell on wheels, it may not actually represent the entire state of Ohio. Just a thought.
Mark
You have clearly not driven across West Texas. My husband has lived all over, including in Ohio, and he maintains West Texas is the worst drive ever.
Having done the Dallas to El Paso Express to visit his home town I am VERY inclined to agree.
@Laurie point well taken. But I ask, is the problem no one is supervising our slightly kooky elders, or in fact is there too much supervision…
I can tell you’ve never had to drive through Texas! I took the train once from L.A. to New Orleans (about 20 year pre-Katrina). It was a two-day trip and it took a full and endless brown desert day, all 24-hours, to go through Texas alone. Texas is the boringest state to go through, ever.
If you are in the right area of NC you will find tanning salons in houses too!
Ha !!!
There isn’t a single US State that a Canadian thinks is bigger than a medium sized county!
I can do way better than stinking Ohio.
- I-80 through Wyoming (Utah border to Cheyenne)
- I-84 through Idaho (Boise to Utah border)
- I-10 in Texas (San Antonia to El Paso)
- I-90 in Montana/North Dakota/Minnesota (Billings to Minneapolis)
- I-70 in Colorado/Kansas (Denver to Salina)
- Drive between Reno and Las Vegas
Those are just the ones I’ve done personally.
Fact: The state of Ohio flag is the only state flag that is in the shape of a burgee. Now who is boring?
I attend grad school in the northwest part of the state and it’s not as bad as a lot of people make it out to be. The cost of living is low in most places and there is lots of diversity in things to do.
i will contend that my new ohio license plate is u-g-l-y. but my city seems to rock.
Can’t speak to TX, but Ohio (if you’re driving east-west, at least), is NOTHING compared to driving through Western Kansas. I was praying for a twister just to liven up the horizon last summer when driving to Colorado from Philly.
PA is a piece of cake, WV is just a panhandle to zip through at that point (and I’ve done hard time on the Interstates and backroads of West By God Virginia), Ohio was a breeze, Indiana and Illinois just whipped right along.
Missouri was long, although pretty to look at, but Kansas. Holy CRAP. Kansas. Grain-silo complexes, tons of nothing–with the exception of the occasional state trooper to make you re-consider speeding–and a sign every 12 miles imploring you to see the six-legged calf and the three-headed toad while buying fireworks from Jesus. And this was along I-70!
Given the emptiness and lack of anyone on the road, I have no idea why (other than for revenue purposes) the speed limit is not posted “as fast as your car can possibly go.”
@Mark The only thing that saved me from falling asleep on the road in Ohio was copious amounts of coffee and satellite radio. Good call!
@KellyO If I’m driving through West Texas for any reason, I have bigger problems than just relocating.
@Jimmy I would love to see my grandmother less supervised, that’s for sure. Sheesh, getting old sucks. Good for Jack Hanna!
@Janiss I might have to concede defeat. You took the train and went through Texas. That is akshully awful.
@Underling I swear to god I saw a tanning bed in a house in michigan, today, and I thought, “Wow, trashiness is an American trait we all share.”
@elliotross There isn’t a single American who can find Canada on a map.
@Lance I agree with the Minnesota referene. Also I-55 from St. Louis to Chicago is just about the edge of death.
@Bryan A burgee makes it even more rendonk. Not helpful.
@Meaningful I know it’s not so bad. Shoot, I’m from Illinois. That’s fly-over country.
@gemellen It does indeed rawk!
@Geoff I’ve done St. Louis to Lawrence, KS, and that’s awful. Horrible. Will agree.