It’s Friday and I want to know more about your personality, today. Are you hassled by the man? Do you feel like you’re often surrounded by a large group of idiots? Or can you let stuff go?
I used to be a fairly high-strung woman but now I pick and choose my battles.
You’re an idiot who talks on the phone in an elevator?
You’ll probably run your car into a tree and die at some point. Too bad for you.
See? I’ve learned to let this shit roll off my back. I’m zen like that.
How about you? Can you let the little things go? Or are you George Costanza?
{ 39 comments… read them below or add one }
I am highly evolved. Not only do I let the little things go but I glide serenely through life spreading my peace & love. I smile at the idiot talking behind me in the movies…wave at the jackass who cuts me off on the highway….sit patiently through the phone call with the non-English speaking customer service rep failing to help me with my problem……and try to lift the spirits of all the OTHER annoyed people in the doctor’s waiting room 2 hours after their appointed time.
Yes, I’m the poster child for quietude and tranquility. Peace be with all of you during this wonderful holiday season. Joy to the world……
And please don’t try to fight me for that parking space at the stinkin crowded mall or I’ll – oops! hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
I left the corporate workplace over two years ago and I haven’t been happier. It’s hard working for the man, not having your great ideas implemented, getting no credit for success yet plenty of blame for any failures.
I’m now the man
and when/if I have employees…I’m going to be the best f-in Boss.
Happy Friday and thanks for making HR a fun topic again.
Ha! Even my inner George gets a kick out of this! The key text is: “A Flash of Lightning in the Dark of Night: a Guide to the Boddhisattva’s Way of Life.” It’s not for everyone, but it can be a life-changer if you’re in the market for one.
It’s opposite day for me. I’m going to do the exact opposite of every supposed rational instinct that I’ve ever had. Instead of wheat bread I’m going to have tuna on rye.
I am the emulation of the “Straw that Broke the Camels Back.” I am peaceful and a lot of patience, however, when I snap, I’m an a$$hole. I’ve got a line drawn in the sand. It’s very generous and very distant. Just don’t cross it.
I’m working on the high strung thing. Laurie, your post made me laugh because that’s EXACTLY how I think.
Especially when it comes to driving. I live in New Jersey, so you can imagine the preponderance of bad driving.
I’m pretty good at not making a big deal out of things, but I don’t know if it’s because I’m zen. People see me as a really patient person, but often just because I’m really good at gritting my teeth and keeping up calm appearances. I’m going to be like Homer Simpson in that episode where he turns into the Incredible Hulk.
Where I really get annoyed is when people get to the top of escalators and immediately step off and STOP so they can figure out where to go next and everyone behind them has to do a bit of fancy footwork to avoid a pile up. TAKE TEN STEPS FORWARD!!! Someone’s going to get an earful one of these days.
In the spirit of the season, I think we should have a Festivus airing of grievances. I gotta lotta problems with you people!!!*
*(not you people specifically – you’re all very nice. Other people.)
Depends on how much other stuff has rolled off, you that crap piles up. I almost had a case of the come aparts on a TSA lady yesterday. Those people could use a lesson on how to be polite. The other thing that drives me bananas is repeating myself. I dont handle that very well, probably why I dont have kids. Oh and ignorance, I could punch those people in the throat.
ok, I’m high strung. Pass the Festivus pole.
I can let things go so well that sometimes, those things I’m letting go become bigger than they would have and then I can’t let it go anymore. Dealing with it then, is sometimes much more difficult. So yeah, if I have an issue it’s “nipping things in the bud”. After 7 years working for someone not serene and zen, I seem to balance my zen with a little more feisty.
Behind the wheel is a whole different story. I like yelling at other drivers for the STUPID-THINGS-THEY-DO all the time. I’m finding that’s not a good habit when your teaching teenage sons to drive.
As far as driving: has anyone noticed a lot more old people on the road? Or is it just me/my community?
I try to let everything roll off my back. It’s just so much easier. It was really hard for a long time, but anti-depressants are a wonderful thing. The whole job thing (or lack thereof) really gets to me because we define ourselves by what we do, but I know I just need to keep at it.
I still want to change the world. But I admit, I am tired of some of the battles and I am becoming more impatiently selfish about some things as I grow older.
I used to want to inspire and lead others in the workplace. I did it, and I did it well. All that got me was smack-downs from less inspiring and less effective “leaders” who were threatened by my ability to inspire others. I am tired of that crap, but I guess I still have some interest, or else I wouldn’t follow all these HR blogs.
Now I inspire via my artwork and social media. I have a much more appreciative audience and anyone who feels threatened is easily kept in their place, instead of vice versa.
I am Angry Little Woman. I try not to be, but I can’t help it. And I think it might be unhealthy to stifle that. If some dumbass in a huge SUV is tailing me when I’m already going above the speed limit, I’ll just slow down to piss off the driver & let them know that I’m in charge of the speed here. I don’t care how much bigger your vehicle is. I am Angry Little Woman. With Small Dog Syndrome.
When someone is yammering on their cell phone in close quarters, I just stare at them until they at least get uncomfortable enough to step away from me. When someone my age insists on writing a check for groceries and does so VERY SLOWLY to write ever letter and number properly, I stand too close to try hurry them along (I get that old people like my grandma insist on checks, so I don’t use this tactic on them because I’ll be old and funny, too, some day).
I realize that all of these are kind of stupid and probably have no impact on those I deem to be the offenders. But it gives me the delusion that I’m in control of my world.
I am totally zen. But i don’t like it when i have to argue my point and all my arguements are based on facts, are thoughtful and valid, and then your comeback is “So what? I’m gonna just go ahead and do the stupid sh*t that you’re trying to talk me out of” That’s gonna get you kicked in the shin.
Nope– haven’t let go of driving yet. One of the expressions at the top of my “social” vocab is: “WILL YOU FUCKING HURRY UP, YOU GODDAMN SON-OF-A &#@!!!*%!!!!! I want to kill you with EVERY MICROORGANISM IN MY BODY RIGHT NOW!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? SIGHT SEEING OR SOMETHING??? AAAAAAAHHHH!!!” See— it’s good to get it all out, right?
And of course I’m surrounded by idiots– isn’t everyone? I’ve taken to just telling people “You know you’re an idiot, right?” Most of them just laugh and say “Yeah, I know– derrr, stupid me!” Some look at you like “What, say… huh? Idiot, I’m, maybe, wha…?” LMAO!!
I’d love to say that I’m together and zen and not bothered by much, but I have to be honest: I am about ten years away from being That Strange Guy on the Park Bench Yelling At The Air.
I actually don’t get angry at a lot of things other people do (the great joy of not driving). But I get really PO’ed when people just don’t pay attention to where the eff they are. This aggravation has increased since I’ve moved to Chicago, because there’s nothing quite as joyous as slow, stupid people coming to a complete stop in the middle of a sidewalk/crosswalk/escalator/crowded bus.
But minor odd behavior (like loud cell phone chatting) doesn’t bother me. It has to ramp up to the level I had on the el this morning, when a man got on my car and for 5 minutes screamed at people that they didn’t know Jesus….followed by a string of curse words that would make sailors blush. If you don’t already love the CTA for its novel invention of the combination elevator/urinal, you will certainly love it for rides like these…..
I can generally let things go yet if it is the same thing over and over again, it does reach a point where I need to blow off steam. I think I am patient and I tell myself that this is a virtue especially when I am about to blow it. People think I am calm and even-tempered and that it must be because I work in HR (right). But I am similar to one of the other posts, I tend to hold it inside and then everyone becomes an idiot.
When it comes to driving in LA, most of the time the thought is, “Really? You’re gonna drive that slow? Don’t you know I am in a rush to get the last parking spot at work? Uggh. What the hell are you doing? Pay attention!” Then I say, “Be patient; it’s a virtue” over and over until the “driver” is away from me.
I’m mostly pretty cool, handling most frustrations as just a part of life. I meditate for a while almost every day, which is very soothing. But…
I get angry over the stupidity/rudeness of others. Mostly it’s over stuff like the putz who stands waiting in line at, say Starbucks or McDonalds for 5 minutes, then when asked for his order looks at the menu like he’s never seen it before and is utterly unprepared for the preposterous assumption that he will be required to pay for the order that he so carefully pondered. My head ’spodes thinking about it, but I never do anything but wish they develop a nasty, festering case of backne.
oh, and working in any way with AT&T makes me just bat-crap crazy mad. As in, I have thrown my phone to the floor and jumped up and down on it. For reference, that is not helpful, nor is it good for one’s phone.
For the majority of you who are preaching the self-delusional “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” crapola are either unemployed or have discovered industrial strength Xanax.
Listen, working for the (wo)man sucks. Always did, always will. When I was in my 20’s working for the (wo)man didn’t suck as much. My daily mood was tempered by my nightly back stroking in a bottle of Sauza.
Then I went and got 30 something, went and get married, started spittin’ out kids and all of the sudden this work thing mattered. Shit! Speaking of which, for the uninitiated diapers ain’t cheap. Apparently washing out the disposal ones is frowned on by most Pediatricians and experienced parents. Who knew? I never got a copy of the “Expert Parenting: Your daily guide on how not to screw up your kids.”
Kids grow up, chronologically speaking, and then enter into the college conspiracy to milk my bank bovine dry. And now the job matters even more. As it is, even with a job, I am looking at Tender Vittles casseroles and Alpo sloppy joes for the rest of my life (thanks, Geo).
So let’s not pretend, my brothers and sisters: hate the (wo)man. Despise their very existence. Be angry they are consuming oxygen better used for the rest of us. Rise up against the (wo)man who have their thumb so squarely in the small of our backs, we find ourselves craving that dirt taste.
Break the chains of oppression! We shall overcome. Or we’ll just show up for work on Monday and bitch anonymously on some web site (but a really COOL website!). Sigh.
I was buying coffee yesterday morning at 6:45 at a Hess station in Tampa. As I entered the store,I walked in behind a 40-something blonde woman who was attired in clothing more befitting a high scholl girl from about 5 years ago. (tight jeans, midriff top, high heels, multi tattoos, etc.) Normally, I don’t pay that much attention to stuff like that, but while I was getting my coffee, she was complaining to the cashier about something, and well,she was loud.
At 6:55, we wind up in line, me standing in front of her,holding three large sized cans of Miller Icehouse beer. A woman was paying for milk with change…and Blondie starts yelling…”hey, today, already!” followed very quickly by “retards!”. I turned around and gave her the evil eye. I get back “What, you got something to say?” to which I responded..”No, it’s not realy worth saying anything about. You speak for yourself.”
I don’t think she got it. When last seen, she was pounding one of the beers behind the wheel of a pick-up, a dopey little yappy dog sitting in her lap.
She wasn’t a hassle really, but she sure as shit was annoying!
@H Aria–You go girl!
@Everyone else–This slightly jaded and somewhat burned out therapist says the whole zen thing is overrated. If your anger doesn’t lead to you pulling weapons, doing things that damage your’s or someone else’s life, or crossing the line into true road rage, it is perfectly healthy.
I will NEVER be nice when traffic is NOT moving when there is a green light!
It rolls off my back – and snowballs into an avalanche! From out my somehow-obtained corner office window in suburban Orlando I watch a person who drives a 2-door white Toyota Yaris park in a handicap space everyday. Yes, the person is legitamately handicapped…she has a hard time walking (however she takes the stairs up one level??)…but anyway I really think that THAT is not her true handicap! It bugs the hell outta me that this lady parks with her front tires ON THE SIDEWALK every day! (there is no curb at that parking space). I think her true handicap is depth perception. Every day I see that Yaris I want more and more to firebomb it…but then it’d be just my luck that one of my employees would end up injured by the car’s explosion and I’d have to file a workers comp claim and notify OSHA of yet another firebombing.
After years of therapy for anger and control issues, I have worked to change my stimulus – response mechanism. Rather than get frustrated when some bonehead in a big truck is tailgating me at night on a wet road, I find a safe place to pull over and let him pass. Because he’s just going to tailgate the next vehicle.
Heard a lecture by Robert Sapolsky on stress (http://news-service.stanford.edu/news/2007/march7/sapolskysr-030707.html) and came to understand the bad health consequences of personalizing the outrageous public behaviors of others.
I am certainly not perfect; I’m getting better all the time.
Have you not read my blog for f**ks sake? If you’d spend a bit of f***ing time paying f***ing attention you’d know the answer! I mean what is the point of putting my b*****ks on the line everyday when now b****r pays attention? Jeez……
Moi? Zen extremo of course…….
And to make matters worse, I put the wrong f***ing URL on the previous post………………Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
@Don’t Deny It:
First, anti-depressants are great. You know why? Because I don’t flip out over stupid things or get upset for absolutely no reason whatsoever. I’m not rendered completely worthless for a week because I’m so depressed that I feel like slitting my wrists. I’m not verbally abusing whoever I’m dating or relying on for emotional support.
…Okay, so apparently there are things that irk me a great deal.
I try to stay impersonal when I see people like the woman Michael described. It is hard to do. Stupidity is not endearing.
@Marsha “Stupidity is not endearing.” Love that.
@econopete You’re on Eli Lily’s payroll, right?
@TheHRD Hahahahahahahaha.
@Eric Whoa, awesome that you’re getting this in check. For some of us, it’s a joke. For others, it’s a real problem.
@Chris [deep breath]
@Michael LOL, calm & cool. You are.
@Don’t Deny It Whoa, you need a blog.
@Just Vikki I don’t have an iPhone — so I’m just laughing.
@Ginger I have no idea why anyone lives in LA. Seriously. That town infuriates me.
@Patrick I seriously think it should be illegal to text/talk and walk. People can’t do it. #fact
@MattyMat I’m that idiot driver. Sorry.
@teresa Ha! Kicked in the shin. That’s what I do with people.
@H.Aria I am Angry Little Woman. With Small Dog Syndrome. I just squealed in delight. That’s awesome.
@BZ We’re a crazy cult of HR bloggers. We pull you in and we won’t let you go.
@nelking You are the queen of feisty. I just know this.
@adowling “SERENITY NOW!”
@Ian I’m sad that GenY kids don’t know Seinfeld.
@Jonathan I f-king hate Jersey drivers.
@HRPuter You are the definition of the psycho neighbor next door. “He seemed like a nice guy. We never expected this.”
@Dave LOL. It’s bizarro day for me.
@kentropic Nah, no life-changing events for me. Not in 2009.
@David I’m sure you will be the best boss (& thanks for the props).
@Fran I can’t imagine you’d fight for that spot. You’d be smart like me and valet that car after looking for more than 15 minutes.
I’m a ruminator. Yes I am. And you should just SEE how long I can hold a grudge! It’s kind of psycho, but if I changed now, people would think I was on drugs or that I became a Scientologist.
Just for the record…I’m a New Jersey diver…..and make that 5 minutes Laurie. Worth the tip
Hey Laurie
It’s late at night and I was bored so I started surfing the net hoping to pick up some new ideas on how to excel my career. Then I came across this website and I have to say I really like your personality. I’m a realist myself and the way you carried yourself caught my attention.
You know what I hate? When grown adults leave trash behind in the movie theater or after a large group of business professionals leave a conference room and most of these so called leaders leave the place covered with trash from all the complimentary snacks!
P.S. I will read those crappy business books!
I’m a corporate business coach and I don’t fit in HR but that’s where they stick me…I threaten the heck out of my HR peeps and sometimes I’m the one who actually hassles the man.
Being a coach, most of the people I work with choose to work with me. I don’t conduct training classes or send people off for more mgmt training… Heck NO! You can’t learn this stuff in a training class. AND I’m not a therapist…that would be my sister’s gig.
You asked, “Do you feel like you’re often surrounded by a large group of idiots?”. Uh yes! On occasion I get a manager who has had their butt chewed out for being a rotten manager (actually they suck more at being leader). They (the boss and the manager) think time with me will help them. This is when my job gets wickedly fun…I quickly cut through their crap and tell them “UNLESS YOU WANT THIS, DON’T WASTE MY TIME TRYING TO ‘LOOK GOOD’ TO YOUR BOSS”. It’s usually a short meeting. Some come back to me…others don’t. The ones that do…are a joy to work with. The ones that don’t are the ones who typically cohort with the ones who hate what I do. I’m fine with that and YES I’m much for peaceful now.
For the first time in my 20 years of working in corporate I really don’t give a rat’s ass where I sit or who likes what I do. Life is good and I do make a difference but not because I sit in HR or because I’m drinking the kool aid. I used to get beat down by others because I had too much passion and energy and I didn’t fit the mold (the corp “go along to get along” mold OR the HR mold). God Bless It, I let that crap go. Now I’m really a high energy, strong woman. I too hate being around idiots and sluggards so I don’t stick around them for very long. I’m living my passion and coaching people who want to do the same.
It’s awesome! btw…I’m 48 and I won’t be wearing CHICOS for at least another 12+ years!
@Laurie Are you kidding? I pay them–Eli Lily–$170 a month! (Let’s hear it for no health insurance!) I should buy stock in them, but I’d rather smack their executives upside the head.
My family swears that it’s worth the cost, though.
Always hassled but I pick my battles. Holiday shoppers who aren’t in the holiday spirit are on my list this week. Most things slide off shoulders mainly because I have too much to do. Did I mention I was hiring an intern?
Jessica
@blogging4jobs
I love ZOLOFT. However, PMS gives it a run for its money every once in a while. People piss me off, but usually it just gives me a good story to tell, getting myself involved with idiots doing their thing might disrupt the universe. I like to see how if all unfolds without any interference from intelligent life forms!
I guess this is the string to leave the post in to have a chance to win all those books? Yeah, I need more books. Would somebody come and take summa’ mine? If anyone cares, a Kindle is on my Christmas Wish List.
hi laurs. i love the angry little woman with little dog syndrome. as for moi… i am 90% zen. “don’t sweat the petty stuff and don’t pet the sweaty stuff.” it wasn’t always so … i used to fester more and rage out over dumb, impersonal shit but i have mellowed with age. my expectations for the world have been adjusted to be more realistic and forgiving. that said, with the 10% of stuff i can’t let go — i really stew over. i don’t get worked up over casual stuff like traffic, but if you lie to me, hurt me or hurt people i love i have a beatrix kiddo-ish penchant for revenge. i might appear to be over it, but i’m probably not. i share the philosophy that revenge is a dish best served cold.
Well, after years of being zen I’m now paying for it. . . literally. . . and my therapist thanks me for it every week!
So, as I’m not out there actually kicking ass as I’d like to be doing, I am not afraid to let my tounge wag, my eyes sear and my finger move upward when meeting up with stupidity. Oh, and the meds really help too
@Laurie – some do! I’m a GenY kid and I used to watch it all the time. My roommates (both GenYs themselves) and I had a Festivus party this year.
Of course, technically I think we’re on the older end of GenY, but still fit the definition as I understand it.
@Laurie YOU HAVEN’T LEARNED TO DRIVE THAT 2 TON PIECE-OF-SHIT YET!!!!! STEP ON THE GAS PETAL, MORON!!!
—LOL